We jokingly mentioned in our live reports of The Mortal's tour last year that, before selling any tickets, they should have had fans complete a questionnaire to assess their overall level of Gothness. Only fans who could pass the test with flying colors (or flying shades of black and pale and hectic red, as the case may be) would be awarded with low numbers and/or front row seats. If the tour manager had taken our advice, the crowd would doubtless have been far more enthusiastic than it ended up being.
Don't believe me? Then note the below screencap from Immortal, and see how a total of three fans actually look like they're enjoying themselves. The song was "Shadow of Love," my friends. They should have been dancing, but no they were not.
But now, amusingly enough, in honor of Whitby Gothic Weekend, none other than the BBC itself has provided us with the gothic litmus test we were lacking. Too little, too late, but we're sharing it here so you can test yourselves, and perhaps even study up a bit for next time. Anyone who earns a score of 8 or above on the first try gets a good seat at The Mortal's next tour.
Take the quiz, friends. The Mortal are watching you closely to see how you fare.