4.3.13

Priceless Quotes from Mr. Sakurai

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Spoken at the past four gigs, at Akasaka Blitz and Tokyo Dome (City Hall) respectively.

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Akasaka Blitz, Day 1, prior to "Elise":

Mr. Sakurai: "What do you want?"

Fans: Kyaaaaaa~~~~!!!!

Mr. Sakurai: "What do you want?"

Fans: Kyaaaaaa~~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111

Mr. Sakurai: "Do you want this?" *points to heart*

Fans: Kyaaaaaa~~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111  Acchan!!!!!!!!!!!

Mr. Sakurai: "No...I think you want....THIS!" *points to (you can guess where)*

Fans: ACCHAN-CHAN-SAMA-CHAN!!!!

Mr. Sakurai: "SEX SHIYOU ZE!"

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(prior to "Miss Take")

(Sakurai pauses to retreat to the back of the stage, turn his back to the audience, open his pants, and copiously re-adjust their contents while the audience looks on and sees nothing.)

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Akasaka Blitz, Day 2 (Sakurai appears onstage with a deeply bloodshot eye.)

Mr. Sakurai: ".................................................................
.................................................................................................ahh."

(fans wait with bated breath)

(Sakurai says nothing more)

*song starts*

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Mr. Sakurai: "................................"

Fans: "ACCHAN!!!!!"

Mr. Sakurai: ".........I didn't think of anything to say today.  Should I have?"

Fans: "ACCHAN-CHAN!!!!!111"

Mr. Sakurai: "As long as your'e enjoying this that's all that matters right?"

Fans: "ACCHAN-CHAN!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111111"

Mr. Sakurai: "Why don't you cheer for Anii, eh?"

Fans: "ANIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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Mr. Sakurai: "............."

Individual fangirl: "Acchan, ganbare!"

Mr. Sakurai: "Oh I am.  You don't know how much."

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Tokyo Dome City Hall, Day One (following Baby, I want you)

Mr. Sakurai: "Baby, I want you!"

Fans: "Baby, I want you!!!!"

Mr. Sakurai: "Baby, I want you!!!!"

Fans: "Baby, I want you!!!!111"

Mr. Sakurai: "Baby, I want you!!!!"

Fans: "BABY AI WANCHUUU!!!"

*music stops*

Mr. Sakurai: "Baby, I want.....................sex."

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Mr. Sakurai: "Tokyo Dome City Hall, eh!  We've never played this venue before.  It's nice, isn't it?  It's fresh.  Of course...there was once a time when we played the Tokyo Dome..............right over there, you know.  And now...we're here.  How time passes."

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Mr. Sakurai: "LOVE!"

Fans: "KYAAAAAAAAAAAA!~!!!"

Mr. Sakurai: "LOVE!!"

Fans: "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!"

Mr. Sakurai: "You know why it's not love you?"

Fans: "KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

Mr. Sakurai: "I bet you don't know."

Fans: "TELL US THEN!"

Mr. Sakurai: "Because, you should learn to love yourselves."

Fans: "We HEART UUUUU!!!!"

Mr. Sakurai: "Not love you.  Love...........ME!!!!"

*band plays "Love Me"*

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Tokyo Dome City Hall, Day Two (prior to "Lady Skeleton")

Mr. Sakurai: "Fuck me, Lady Skeleton!"

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(prior to "Elise")

Mr. Sakurai: "It's getting hot in here."

Fans: "ATSU!!!!!!!!!!!" (lol for those of you who get that dumb joke.)

Mr. Sakurai: "This is getting hot too!" *grabs (you can guess where)*

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(prior to Miss Take)

(Sakurai pauses to retreat to the back of the stage, turn his back to the audience, open his pants, and copiously re-adjust their contents while the audience looks on and sees nothing.  This feels like deja vu.)

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Mr. Sakurai: "This tour just goes on and on.  But at last the end is in sight."

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Mr. Sakurai: "Not that I have anything against touring.  Now I feel kind of lonely."

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(prior to Kimi no Vanilla)

Mr. Sakurai: "SEX!"

Fans: "...........................kyaaaaaaaaa!!!!"

Mr. Sakurai: "Sex sex sex!"

*song starts*

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*song ends*

Mr. Sakurai: "............sex."

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Ganbare Mr. Sakurai.

The End.

19 comments:

  1. Ha, ha, ha...

    Wow.

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  2. No doubting in values of every posts you make guys, but that one was definitelly one of the most epic ones.

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  3. Hmmm...I wonder what happened to his pants?

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  4. Doki doki...Sakurai-san is made for the stage.

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  5. Thanks for that! Oh my, Sakurai is so witty with sex :)
    I got the Atsu-joke :D
    And why was his eye red?

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  6. Regarding the one about Sakurai lamenting the fact that they can no longer fill the Tokyo Dome; I know that the band's popularity has dropped since their heyday in the 90s, but has their fanbase really shrunk so much that they can't fill up a stadium anymore? I mean, most of their singles and albums chart in the top 10, and they still pull off lengthy national tours... just seems like they should still be able to hold a show in a high-capacity venue every now and then.

    (though obviously I say this from the perspective of someone who isn't around to see how active their fanbase actually is over there, so feel free to lay a smackdown on me if I'm just completely offbase here)

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  7. Oh, poor Sakurai. His wife must have been away when he's on tour. :P

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  8. @ Anonymous - As if he needs a wife for that.

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  9. @ Ruki-chan - Nope, not at all.

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  10. @ Lawrence - They aren't popular enough to sell out the Tokyo Dome anymore, the Dome holds 50000 people. They can sell out the Budoukan once a year but that's only 15000. If I'm not miss taken they didn't even manage to sell out Tokyo Dome City Hall. But I prefer them this way since arena concerts are worse than watching TV.

    @ Juli - I think his eye was red because he was a sex-crazed beast.

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  11. I honestly thought I had misheard the "Fuck me, Lady Skeleton" line. Glad to hear I wasn't imagining things.

    He'll get arrested if he keeps using that language in public, you know. I heard that can happen. /laughs

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  12. Ah, this is not the first time the "re-racking of balls" happened.

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  13. @ Mawb - Hush, you'll start rumors that it's actually illegal to say "sex" in public in Japan!

    @ Anonymous - it wasn't even the first time it happened on this tour.

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  14. @Cayce So it's the case of "squished plums"? /loling

    Errr the pants is so fitting then? XD

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  15. @ Mimi - Squished plums, readjusting how his shirt tucks into the pants, and readjusting the battery box for his wireless mic, would be my guess. And, the art of the tease. I think in this case the pants aren't quite tight enough...the red ones he was wearing on the last tour definitely had no room in them for slippage. Also he could never have put his hand down them the way he put his hand down these. Incidentally in Japan, pickled plums are eaten as a health tonic.

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  16. The online translator says Shizou can mean many things:

    shiyou leaves branches, side issues, foliage
    shiyou way, method, resource, remedy
    shiyou trial
    shiyou use, application, employment, utilization
    shiyou personal use, private business

    Which one would you suggest he meant?

    Poor Sakurai-san sounds like he needs a holiday. Somewhere where there is a lot of SEX!

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  17. @ Anonymous - 1. I am the online translator.

    2. Not all Japanese phrases are mysteries to be cracked. I only left that phrase in Japanese because I thought it was simple enough that everyone would understand it. "Shiyou ze" means "let's do it."

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  18. Nope not simple enough for us simpletons :) Thanks for the translation.

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