Buck-Tick Gossip via. The Hisashi Inquirer and the Daily Toll (Tabloids of Buck-Tick Land)

Since Anonymous has aimed its Foxy Guy masks and low orbit below-the-belt bitcannon at me and my blog and accused me of being "boring," and demanded juicy Buck-Tick gossip, I have no choice but to obey.

After all, Anonymous are legion.

Next thing I know they'll be hacking my brand spanking new Twitter account, and will be posting my secret Acchan-chan fantasties all over the internetz.

So, Buck-Tick gossip:

Gossip Number 1. Cayce attended Toll's birthday tour at a certain club in a certain off-the-beaten-path part of Tokyo. Some actions were initiated at this gig that caused certain fangirls to experience what is technically known as a "Tollgasm." Cayce has been planning on writing a live report of this occurrence, but has been being forced to translate reams of security briefings in exchange for lunch money, and hasn't had much writing juice left to spare for Toll (toil takes a toll on us all.)  Having to engage in boring tasks to earn money: the not-so-fun part of adulthood.  As to the fun part of adulthood, kids, I ask you the following - do children enjoy childhood as much as adults enjoy adultery?

Gossip Number 2. On Toll's birthday, Imai Hisashi gave birth to a healthy baby (his first) and is now healthily lactating it. Word has it that he's settling well into his new role as mother. The father is unknown but rumored to be Motokatsu, former drummer of the Mad Capsule Markets. Motokatsu was not available for comment in regards to this article.

Gossip Number 3. Most recently, a source tells us that Mr. Imai was spotted attending a Satanic summoning ritual to bring the late esteemed Hideto Hide Matsumoto back from beyond the grave for a few short hours on the evening of Saturday, September 14th, to perform as the headlining act at Kishidan's rock festival, The Kishidan World's Fair.  Our source tells us that the ritual involved participants performing Hide songs at high speeds while clad in sparkly outfits patterned with pink rhinestone spiders. Mr. Imai was spotted with his guitar hanging around his neck and his baby on his back in a papoose. Our source assures us that the baby was outfitted with noise-cancelling headphones to protect the eardrums of its future pop genius from harm. The baby is rumored to have eyes exactly like Mr. Imai's. Mr. Motokatsu was also spotted at this event. The purpose for his attendance could not be confirmed.

Gossip Number 4. Mr. Imai went to a party with Sugizo who poured liquor down his throat till he passed out. Shame Sugizo, don't you know that man is a mother now?

Gossip Number 5. Higuchi Yutaka went to the beach and got a tan.

Gossip Number 6. I know the only person y'all really wanna hear about is Acchan-chan, but he's been too busy making cat gifs to answer any of my texts.